Shh. Let me tell you a secret.

i can't do it.

I just can't. Its just one of those things. I can't bring myself to even pronounce it with my lips. Its something that I will possibly never ever get over for the rest of my life. Ever.

I'm ill.. with a very bad bout of flu, and it isn't fun at all when you've just got so so much work to do.

I'm not excited about christmas at all. Just doesn't 'feel' it.

Would love to have a winter BBQ... wonder if Martha has any good ideas.. hmm..

Enough to make me jump 3 feet high.

Been busy as usual.. And i'm ill. Quite ill, and i've got lots of work to do. : (

Lots of new experiences as usual. But things haven't been on the good side for the past.. 2 weeks?

Its amazing how just a few small events can change your outlook so drastically. Worse, change your mood for the worse. I've come to terms with several major things in my life, of which, I am still not yet comfortable to speak on this blog. But nevertheless, i'm becoming increasingly comfortable discussing my private life with some people. Which I never thought possible.

I'm just generally upset. lets hope it doesn't last long, because i neither have the time nor the energy to remain upset. : ( busy busy busy.